About this Blog. . .

I have recently discovered a feature on blogspot that allows me to look at the statistics of my readers.  I can only account for not having noticed this feature for the past year and a half by virtue of the feature being cleverly hidden by Google.  After all, "stats" could clearly mean lots of things. . .

Anyway, with my award winning blog post on tomato sauce (see below), I have noticed that I have crossed double digits in readership.  Woohoo!  Now, either my writing has filled you all with insight, or I've picked up a few cyberstalkers.  Either way, welcome to my blog!

(totally not self awarded)

So, give that so many of you are new to this blog, I felt it only necessary to let you in on a few secrets:


1) I am terribly, terribly liberal.  I don't mean that I'm center-left, or a "New Democrat," but rather, I am extremely liberal.  So much so, that if you ever wanted to know my opinion on something, you should think of what a pinko-communist-socialist would think, and you wouldn't be that far off. . .

Okay, that's not entirely true.  I think guns are perfectly fine to own and operate by responsible adults.  Of course, most people are morons, but if you can prove to me that you are, in fact, a morally responsible adult, then I'm okay with you owning enough weapons to supply a small to medium size army.  Because guns are cool.

I also hate hippies (more based on their personal hygiene and musical choices), don't smoke pot (but completely favor legalization), believe that corporations are AMORAL not IMMORAL (there's a difference) and think that local governments are way too intrusive with their regulations (the Federal government on the other hand. . .)

2) I use swear words, often.  Ever had a friend who said something so obscene that you a) cringed; and, b) laughed a bit.  I am, on occasion, that friend.  In my defense, I take it on good authority - Father Rankin, S.J., my 11th grade Christian Ethics teacher - that the use of words like fuck, shit, motherfucker, cocksucker, assmunch, goat-raping shittard, and other sundry words is totally sin-free.  That's right people, if any of you Catholics were to walk into a confessional and tell the priest that you, in a fit of anger from stubbing your toe, shouted, "Pissfuckingsonofamotherfuckingshitknocker," the priest would, most likely, tell you that you were wasting his fucking time. 

Now, don't get me wrong here.  I don't use swear words in general conversation, or use them to hurt people.  Rather, there are times when the use of obscene words is necessary (or funny), and rather than limit myself, I go for it with gusto.

3) I am often wrong.  If you look through my backlog, there are numerous examples of posts that I simply cannot defend to this day.  They are embarrassing.  And no I'm not going to tell you which ones I feel bad about, and yes, this is a cheap attempt to drive up my readership numbers so that I might finally get some ad revenue for this blog (Daddy wants a new pair of shoes).  To be honest, I typically write posts when I have a brief to get out at work and I need to get the creative writing juices flowing. So, there is going to be a lot of crap on this website.

Anyway, I do get things wrong, and that's why comments are not only enabled, but welcome.  I will, however, remove comments that I find threatening, harassing, etc.  And before anyone complains about the First Amendment, let me remind you that the 1st Amendment only applies to governmental actors, and this is not a government site. (And from the opinions expressed herein, it probably will never be.)

With all that in mind, feel free to read my blog (as if I could stop you), and enjoy.

Sad Truths (hopefully, vol. 1)

As Bogart has repeatedly pointed out, I'm a pretty big firebomber when it comes to politics. That said, I would really would like to have a legitimate conversation about politics and policy in this country, and try to come up with solutions to problems. With that in mind, the following includes sad truths that conservatives must accept. I invite my conservative readers (all three of you - which is about half of my regular readership) to pen a similar post, and I will post it on this blog. So here goes:

Sad Truths That Conservatives Must Accept

1. Obama was born in the United States

Sure, Obama has a funny name, a weird personal history, and all that. But let's be clear, his birth certificate says he was born in Hawaii, the local papers announced his birth as being in Hawaii back in the 1960's, and the Governor of Hawaii (who was friends with Obama's parents) remembers visiting Obama's parents in a Honolulu hospital. The dude was born in the States. Get over it.

2. Obama is a Christian

Look, I'll concede that Obama's father and stepfather were, at least in theory, Muslims, but its also clear that Obama was raised by his Christian grandparents, and by the time he was starting out as an organizer in Chicago, he was pretty much agnostic. He then converted to Christianity, not for show, but for real. Remember the whole Jeremiah Wright thing? Obama credited the guy with converting him, which is why he didn't immediately throw Wright under the bus - and instead gave one of the most reasoned, impassioned speeches on race in America, ever. If you listen to his speeches, he refers to the Bible (the Christian Bible) over and over again.

3. Evolution is Real

For those of you out there that think that evolution is "just a theory" keep this in mind - evolution, the process by which organisms change to suit their surroundings has been observed thousands of times in thousands of conditions. In other words, species evolve. The only theoretical part about evolution is the how. Does it occur all at once or gradually? What are the mechanisms that cause it to happen? Why do some species evolve and others do not? But there is no question whatsoever that evolution is real, and that its occurring.

4. Global Climate Change is Real

First of all, as a San Diegan who went through an entire summer where the Sun did not come out at all, I can tell you that the weather is totally bizarre lately. We've seen bigger than ever storms, severe droughts, crazy shit all over. Now, what's causing the craziness? The overall temperature of the Earth is warming, which means there's more heat than before, and heat is energy, and energy makes shit go crazy. That's physics 101. So, what's causing increase in heat? Well, there's more carbon dioxide in the atmosphere than before - something that has been measured by scientists over the past 50 years, and studied by measuring the carbon dioxide levels in air trapped in glaciers. So, what's causing the carbon dioxide? Well, let's see: carbon dioxide is created when carbon burns, and in the past 150 years, human beings have gotten really, really good at burning carbon, and the population of humans has quadrupled. All of this comes from science. Not science paid for by oil companies, but from independent scientists. And here's the thing, before a scientist can publish his results, he/she has to make sure everything is perfect so that other scientists can reproduce his or her results. In other words, a good scientific paper is like a cake recipe - its worth is in being able to show the same findings over and over again.

5. Fox News is Lying to You

Fox News likes to tell its viewers that its news is fair and balanced. Its not. On a regular basis, Fox tells its reporters and on-air personalities to shade the truth. Check this out. The whole, Obama is a socialist meme is fake. If anything, Obama is a cross between a New Deal Democrat and a Clintonian, pro-business Dem. Anyway, this makes sense because Fox News' business model is all about giving news a conservative spin. That is different from CNN because CNN's business model is all about being an objective purveyor of the news (which they suck at, and thus, CNN is unwatchable, but that's another story). So, Fox News doesn't get viewers by being accurate, it gets them by riling them up. The more of you who believe Obama is a socialist and the anti-Christ and a secret Muslim hell bent on destroying the country, the more of you watch Fox to gather updates on the impending doom, the more money Fox makes.

6. All Corporations are Amoral

This is one that I have to teach liberals as well. Corporations are not evil, but they're not good either. Rather, corporations exist for one purpose only - to make money. Not to save the environment, or to protect puppies, or to instill good, Christian values, but to make money. They may make money by helping people, or by screwing people, but they must make money. If they don't, their shareholders will get pissed and fire everyone. The only thing that distinguishes corporations is how they make money. Ford makes money by selling cars, Google makes money by selling internet advertising. But ultimately, they exist to make money.

I bring up this point because as a result of this single-mindedness, corporations will do both good and bad things. They will produce products we all want, but may use sloppy and dangerous methods to produce the products. They hire employees, but seek to pay them as little as possible. And corporations have shown no qualms about killing their customers with their products so long as it does not affect the bottom line. At the same time, corporations drive the economy, make cool shit, and put money in our pockets.

So, the way I think of corporations is like how I think of my dog - he provides great companionship, is friendly to humans and dogs, gets my ass off the couch, and is a good watchdog. But he has an intense desire to kill small furry animals - cats, squirrels, rabbits, etc. - and so when I walk him, I have to keep him on a short leash. Similarly, regulations have to exist to some degree to prevent corporations from leg-humping or worse. But liberals have to keep in mind is that we have to give corporations some ability to operate.

I. Am. So. Pissed. Off. Right. Now.

Okay, that's not quite true.  In the wake of the complete and utter disaster that was last night, I am more or less depressed.  But to make a few of you happy, here are my thoughts:

1) Anger With Obama and the Democratic Leadership: In the last two years, Democrats had proof, actual, real proof, that Republican economic policy was a complete and utter failure, and they did nothing with it.  No mortgage foreclosure reform.  No bankruptcy reform.  A stimulus that was completely limp and relied on tax cuts (which, by the way, don't do shit in a deflationary cycle).  All we could do was stop the economic bleeding.  Now, that would have been enough to explain to the voters, but oh, fucking, no, we can't do that.

Instead of actually governing, the Democratic "Leadership" fought amongst themselves - okay the Democrats in the Senate did the fighting - and we ended up with watered down everything.  Anyway, it wasn't the liberals who fucked everything up.  It was the moderates.  The half-measures didn't help enough people, pissing off the moderates, and deflated the Democratic base.  And guess what, when you lose even some of the base, you lose the election.  The GOP figured this out thirty years ago. 

So, I'm very, very angry with the Democratic Leadership right now.  Okay, not with Nancy Pelosi, who did everything she was supposed to do.

2) Depressed Over Good People Losing: There were lots of good, smart people who lost yesterday.  Russ Feingold worked his ass off for the people of Wisconsin, and lost because of the weak-kneed bullshit of his more conservative fellow Democrats. 

Worst of all, for me personally, Howard Wayne lost to Lorie Zapf in the race for San Diego City Council.  Howard Wayne was overqualified to be a City Councilman, and who cares about people.  He might have dressed like a schlub, and wasn't a good public speaker, but Wayne is a true public servant who, when he isn't a public official, he is a public servant (literally - he is an Assistant AG).  And he lost to Lorie Zapf, who hasn't done a goddamn thing in her life for the public good, and speaks in talking points.  Ugh.

And here's where I get upset really - it would be one thing if Democrats lost to good, hard-working, smart, and well-deserving conservatives.  But they didn't, for the most part.  With the exception of Brian Sandoval - the next Governor of Nevada (and potentially huge problem for the Democrats in the future) - the GOP candidates were the dregs of the conservative movement.  Let's face it, good conservatives don't run for office, they go out and make money.  So instead of intelligent discourse, we're going to have talking points and lunatic conspiracy theories.  Fucking great.

3) Fear for the Future: We have big, big problems in this country, and this next Congress isn't going to help fix any of them.  If there's a government shutdown, we're going to end up in a full-blown deflationary cycle, and the economy will get worse.  That's for certain.  At best, we're looking at two years of gridlock.  At worst, two years of Democratic capitulation.  Fuck.

4) Hope: At least in California, we got Jerry Brown, almost passed Prop. 19, and rejected Prop. 23.  There is some hope for the future.  Some.